Ascendant or Rising Sign

Per my What Does Mars Really Have to do with Men? blog post, the Ascendant or Rising represents the way you present yourself to the outside world and how others perceive you, plus the role you played in your family while growing up. It is calculated based on the astrological zodiac sign that was on the horizon the minute you were born and is considered a very important factor of the birth chart. Per Cafe Astrology, where you can go to get your own birth chart, it says the Ascendant or Rising is a symbol of how one acts in life. It is the image of the personality as seen by others, and the attitude that one has towards life.

My Ascendant is in Capricorn and the way I’d generically describe myself with this placement is that I present myself as serious, responsible, and hard-working, though I will say this is to the point it becomes a detriment with other areas of my life such as relationships and especially my health. My constant worry about future stability is the main driver of these characteristics and have had many other people use the same descriptive words when describing me.

According to my natal/birth chart from Cafe Astrology this is the description the report provides:
There’s a seriousness to Capricorn rising people that is unmistakable. Even when they’re joking around, it’s of the deadpan variety. In fact, plenty of very humorous people have Capricorn Ascendants. It’s all in the timing…and the fact that they don’t giggle before the joke is over. Capricorn Ascendant people project competence. They simply ooze it. They’re generally very image-conscious people–the clothes they wear and their manner are a big
deal to them. They want to appear successful, and they generally succeed! Often the Ascendant persona is the one that was forced upon us by family conditioning. For example, parents may label their Libra Ascendant child the “nice” one; their Aries Ascendant child the “independent” one; and their Pisces Ascendant child is generally the space cadet of the family. We adopt these roles as familiar ones, and often carry them with us as our defense mechanisms, in some way or another, for the rest of our lives. In the case of Capricorn Ascendants, these were the children who were considered the responsible ones. Sometimes, it was they themselves who looked around them and felt the need to be the structured, dependable, and responsible members of the family. So, often, Capricorn rising people adopted a strong sense of tradition, family, and responsibility at a very young age.

Capricorn rising people are generally big on family, and forever worry about security–for themselves and their dependents. They come across to others as hard-working, competent, and dependable people. What others may not see under that cool, even suave, exterior, is an inner struggle: they often ask themselves, “Am I doing enough?”, “Do I deserve all of this?”, “How can I make things better?” They worry a lot about the future. If success seemed to have come easy to these folks, it hasn’t. They just made it look that way with a patient, hard-working, driven personality. Some Capricorn rising people practice some form of self-denial. They know how to do away with the frivolous. Still, they’ll spend money on the clothes they really want (the ones with the right labels, that is), and other status symbols. Although they’re rarely showy, their quiet air of success is often a result of conscious effort. More often than not, Capricorn rising individuals are success stories. Their childhoods may have been difficult, but they slowly but surely turn their lives around. Saturn rules this Ascendant, and this generally means a kind of backwards way of living–as children, they are serious and bear a lot of responsibility; and as they grow up, they age beautifully, learning how to loosen up.

After reading that description, a majority of it is accurate. I am very serious and have been told I am too serious throughout my entire lifetime. I wouldn’t say that I am the type to joke a lot either but am not sure if my type of humor is considered a dry variety. I put it out to those who know me to tell me if I have a deadpan or dry humor. I do consider myself very competent and feel others get that sense from me as it is a regular occurrence to be asked to work on something, whether in a professional or personal setting because people recognize that I am the type of person to get things done. And, yes, I am generally very image-conscious, almost always taking care in what I wear no matter the occasion. As an example, when I was living with my best friend years ago, she happened to catch me on the way out the door and immediately stopped me to ask where I was going. When I responded that I was going to Target, she was shocked to hear my sole destination because of my attire, which was more suited for going out to a nice dinner, date or other event. As an example, I will not hesitate to wear dress pants or a skirt with a silk blouse or cashmere sweater with high heels and jewelry or even a dress that is beyond casual when simply running errands. That being said, I do have my moments of when I’m feeling lazy or don’t really care and can be found walking the aisles of a grocery store wearing pajamas without even having bothered to put a bra on!

Looking back on my childhood, I was considered a responsible child, but can’t say with entire certainty if that was a result of my parents’ conditioning or something I adopted on my own as a result of my family dynamic. I would imagine it is a combination of both as my parents were extremely strict and raised me to be responsible both with my studies and my chores, plus having to deal with a lot of fighting and arguments in the home left me feeling very uncomfortable and unstable. I remember believing that if I kept my head down and did what was expected of me then at least I wouldn’t be cause of any further tension at home. My line of thinking was this, if I could be the dependable child who took her responsibilities seriously and could be counted on to do them, that would be the best way to avoid additional negative interactions. I knew I could not control my parents or siblings and how they all interacted with each other and myself, but if I acted appropriately, then there would be no additional ammunition that could be pulled out when under fire. Of course, it didn’t usually work out that way because there was always something negative to be said about me, but that is what I always strived for.

Growing up, I never felt close to my immediate family since I felt like the odd one out, always getting into fights with my siblings and not ever being good enough to satisfy my parents expectations. We were the ones only living in the states and all other extended family lived in other countries until I became an adult, so I did not experience any family gatherings like others may have growing up. It was only as an adult, when family came to the U.S. and I was old enough and had the funds to be able to travel that I really began to prioritize family. I made significant effort to always travel to spend time with my cousins, aunts and uncles and even my brother. The description of forever worrying about security and the future is spot on and kept all below the surface. The fact that I bury that worry is a big factor of why I have struggled with getting a good night’s sleep, since I constantly think of all the things that can go wrong when laying in bed at night. I also agree that people seem to see me as successful, but don’t necessarily know how hard it has been for me to get to where I am. Only those closest to me have seen how hard and what ridiculously long hours I have put in for decades. When it comes to the statement of self-denial and doing away with the frivolous, that does not seem accurate because as the next sentence says, I do spend my money on the clothes and other status symbols that I really want, not hesitating to spend thousands on shoes for example with the well known luxury brands. It says that I am rarely showy, which I think once again is not entirely true. I would describe myself as being subtly showy with high end brands that may not be initially obvious at first glance. Then I have my moments where I love to bling out! Since I felt my childhood was difficult, I agree that I grew up a bit backwards in that I was serious and felt a lot of responsibility, rarely allowing myself to act in any other manner. It is only recently, much later in life that I am beginning to loosen up. A friend recently posted on Facebook something to the effect that she would say whatever she wanted when she was younger, often making people cry, but now is really nice – basically holding her tongue. When I read that, I thought to myself that I am the complete opposite. I have forever bit my tongue and did not say things I thought or felt for my entire life, until now, when I am finally opening up and finding the courage to say the deep thoughts and emotions that I have kept under lock and key for so long. I now prioritize my own feelings over others, despite if what I have to say will hurt them and even make them cry.

As indicated in my What Does Mars Really Have to do with Men? post, I will also go over another person’s chart, named Kali, who is born on the same month and day as I was, but different year and location to offer a comparison of how two people with the same birth day, can be vastly different despite both being Scorpios. According to Kali’s natal/birth chart from Café Astrology her Ascendant is in Leo and this is the description the report provides:
How unique and original Aquarius rising natives come across! These individuals are just that — individuals, and they won’t let you forget that fact. Often turned to for advice, these natives possess intellectual poise and savvy. They often are curious, and quite learned, in both science and metaphysics–anything that involves advancement of the human race holds much appeal. It’s hard to shock an Aquarius rising. They’ve seen it all, or at least want you to think they have. In fact, they often enjoy shocking others. Not that they are flamboyant by nature, but they do like to, albeit quietly, get a rise out of others. Some natives born with Aquarius on their Ascendant can be quietly provocative and irreverent. Most people with this Ascendant are quite friendly and likable. Their personality quirks generally go over quite well with others. They generally give others quite a bit of freedom–accepting, as a rule, people from all walks of life as equals. And, their somewhat cool and detached curiosity about all that goes on around them appeals to most.

Curiously, Aquarius rising people can be a little standoffish while also coming across as humanitarian and kind. Often labeled as independent and original children, Aquarius rising natives often feel a little “different” or “special” throughout life. They often feel like they are on the outside looking in, and their ability to observe and deduce is often uncanny. They’re also adept at getting things to work, even when the parts that make up the whole seem like a puzzle with unusual pieces–especially when it comes to groups of people. This sets them apart as managers and team leaders. The Ascendant often reveals physical mannerisms and even choice of dress, as it shows how people present themselves to the world. With Aquarius here, natives sometimes have a quirkiness to their manner, and some dress in a slightly offbeat manner–not enough to make them stand out like a sore thumb, but just enough to express their original temperament.

Because these people seem so open to new ideas, it may be surprising when you encounter their decidedly stubborn streak. Aquarius is a fixed sign, after all. The ascendant sign shows how individuals react to new situations, and with Aquarius rising, there can be a resistance to change that seems to belie the native’s generally progressive nature. There’s a distinct inflexibility with Aquarian rising people, and, sometimes, a tendency to want to force their opinions on others. With their eye to the future of mankind as a whole, some people born with an Aquarius Ascendant overlook the more personal needs of the people closest to them. They are often attracted to partners who possess self-confidence and ardor.